Friday, August 14, 2009

Last year August 14th was a Thursday. 

Last year August 14th was my first day back to work from a wonderful summer vacation. 

Last year on August 14th I was 24 weeks and 1 day pregnant.

Last year August 14th was a changing day. I was shaken. I was scared. I was terrified of what was to come.

I returned to work after a fun-filled, pregnant summer. We typically have a theme for the first day back or a special request. Last year we were to wear our favorite t-shirt. I knew exactly what I was going to wear.

 
We mingled. We talked. We ate. I worked in my room. I walked the halls. I sat in meetings. Around 3pm I left for a 3:30 appointment with my OB. There were papers all over my desk. Name tags that still needed names. Lesson plans that still needed planning.

It wasn't a scheduled or routine appointment. For several days prior to the appointment I had been experiencing a watery discharge. (Sorry for all the information.) I had called about it and was told that it was normal and things like that happened during pregnancy. I wasn't convinced. I just couldn't shake the thought that this was my water slowly leaking. Travis had been to every appointment prior to that time. Every single one. But this time I told him that I could handle it. I would run in and run out and be home in no time.

Three hours later I was still at the doctor's office. I was sitting in a recliner hooked up to various monitors and machines. Not only did I have a watery discharge, but I was 1cm dilated and 50% effaced. I was alone. I was shocked. Terrified. Scared to death. I could barely move or breathe or even talk. I was surrounded by three doctors from the practice and two nurses. But I never cried. Never shed a tear. And when the doctors told me that I could not return to work and that I was on bed rest, I even protested a little. I tried explaining that I was a teacher. And that today was only my first day. And that there were kids and other adults depending on me. It didn't matter. They weren't concerned with my school, or my co-workers, or my students. They were only concerned with me and my baby.

My cell phone was on the front seat of my car. I couldn't call Travis. I couldn't call my mom. I couldn't call anyone. And I really didn't want to. I didn't know what to say or do. By this time the doctor's office was completely empty. Everyone had left except for me, my OB and one extremely nice nurse. She sat with me. She brought me water. She shared her experiences of pregnancy. She talked about things that didn't involve babies or pregnancy. She stayed with me until I walked out the door at 6:30. The minute I walked out of the door I began to cry.

I got in the car and just sat there and cried. What was I going to tell Travis? What were we going to do? Were we going to be okay? And more importantly, was our baby girl going to be okay? I wasn't supposed to be dilated or effaced. I wasn't supposed to be on bed rest. I was supposed to be pregnant and stay pregnant for many, many more weeks. Our baby still had a lot of growing and developing to do.

I picked up my phone. There were numerous missed calls. Travis. Travis. My mom. My mom. Travis. Owens. Travis. My mom. Owens. I called Travis, but all I could do was sob. I drove home through tears. My eyes were so blurry. I finished talking to Travis and then called my mom. 

The minute I walked through the door at home Travis was there. He just held me and for a long time we didn't say anything.

Little did I know what we were in store for. Little did I know what the next days were going to have hold for us. Little did I know that our baby girl was going to arrive in just ten days.

Little did I know what August 14th would look like only a year later.

Boy, I sure do like the way this August 14th looks. 

15 comments:

Shelly said...

Great post Heather ..... made me teary eyed. MK is such a cutie pie. Hope that you, Trav and MK have a wonderful weekend and you have a very Happy Birthday. I have enjoyed following MK thru the last year and getting first hand updates on a regular basis. You have a very special little girl and a wonderful family - all of them.

Shelly

michele said...

Your blog was a suggested one to me in Google Reader. This post is absolutely beautiful. I don't even know you, but I'm in tears reading your words. Praise God that you have so much to celebrate a year later!

God bless you and your family,
Michele

The mom of 4 monkeys! said...

What a great post! I have tears in my eyes at the miracle that you were part of.

Heather said...

What a great post to read. I LOVE what this August 14th had brought you this year! A big cheesy toothy grin from a very special little lady.

Thanks for the comment on my blog. We did have a very exciting day this week and I am going to blog about it this weekend. I hope your weekend is great!

Devon said...

Oh sweetie ...beautiful words during such a hard time. Morgan Kate is a blessing....she's beautiful and I'm so glad that one year later, today holds a new set of dreams and wonder. You little girl brings so much hope for my little one!

Thank u for sharing your heart.

Liz and Tony Mitchum said...

I dont know if it is my hormones or what, but I just got very teary eyed, you have been through so much in the last year - but the best part is Morgan Kate is perfect. She is healthy and happy and she has the best parents to learn from. I am so happy for you and Travis and the love and devotion you have to each other and your family! I too, love this August for you and for me! Our babies share a birthday month - one year apart.
Can't wait to see you and Morgan Kate.
Love,
Liz

caryn said...

Since I have been following your blog since you posted a link over on Keileigh's blog I knew the outcome, however, I still got teary reading this. So glad you insisted on seeing a doctor ~ your first mother's intuition experience. I was on bed rest most of my pregnancy so I can relate.

Lorena Carrillo de Bianchi said...

Looooove your post!!! I wish I could remember that well everything that happened to me a year ago.. it's all just a big blur.

Morgan Kate is looking more beautiful every day!

Anonymous said...

I remember those first days of school last year too! We were all much in prayer for you, Travis and that sweet little baby. God is good!
Wendy H.

THE SPIVEY"S said...

I just started crying all over again. I can't even begin to imagine what you went through last year at this time or for this whole year with all of MK's bumps and strides. But WOW she is one strong and powerful little girl. She is so blessed and loved everywhere. We certainly miss you alot at work but you are right where you need to be.

Anonymous said...

Heather,
I just read this post, and tears were rolling down my cheeks, it gave me goose bumps. Morgan Kate is such a BEAUTIFUL little girl, and I enjoy reading about what is going on in your lives. I read your blog all the time! I want to say HAPPY BIRTHDAY to you (a little late) and HAPPY BIRTHDAY to MK! We miss her all the time, but she is obviously in good hands with a wonderful family! God Bless you and your family! Keep the updates and pics coming!
Love,
Kari RT in PHB NICU

Anonymous said...

A year, 365 days and so many changes in our lives. Some good, some not so good--but life does go on.. Don't blink or MK will be in her 20's, getting married and having babies of her own.. Time ---we never ever have enough--especially when we are having fun.. Have a great weekend.
Love, Aunt Rhonda

Jason and Talyse Burkett said...

I was just thinking this morning that nine months ago today I was admitted into the hospital, so boy, did this post bring me to tears!

MK is truly a miracle, and your family has been so richly blessed!

Jenny Garris said...

Amazing!! Celebrate! Celebrate! :)

Melissa and Sam said...

Yes! This August 14th is a different story! Happy birthday!
Love you,
Melissa