Monday, May 18, 2009

This is what a rainy Sunday afternoon looks like around our house.

Lola curled up on the back of the couch. Cash sprawled out on the floor at Travis' feet. Travis snoozing in the recliner. And Morgan Kate sound asleep in her swing.

I am so glad that I don't receive monthly or quarterly progress reports on my job as a mother. I feel like I would do pretty well in most areas, but I would get a big, fat F when it comes to naptime. Seriously. When it comes to naptime, I don't have a clue. I have been having "nap issues" for quite some time now. You may remember this post or perhaps this one. Naptime is hard. Very hard.

Here are a few of my problems/issues. It's in list form because it helps me organize my thoughts. And I happen to have a lot on this topic.

1. When Morgan Kate is sleeping out of my sight, whether it be at night or during her nap, she is supposed to wear her apnea monitor. This is not a problem at night. We get her ready for bed, stick on the stickies, turn on the monitor and she is good to go. During the day it's different. Most of the time she gets fussy, I realize she is tired, I dink her a few times and she falls fast asleep. There really isn't an opportunity to "hook up" the monitor. So usually I just hold her while she sleeps or else I put her in her swing so that I can watch her. I don't like putting her in the crib without her monitor on. Today I tried something different. She got fussy, I took her to her room, changed her diaper and "hooked up" her monitor. I then dinked her a few times, she fell asleep and I put her in her crib. Perfect. Great. Things were really working out. Not so much. Less than thirty minutes later she was wide awake and crying. 

2. Which leads to my second problem. If I hold her she will sleep for two hours or longer. I know, I know. Probably not the best thing to do. But in order to keep my sanity through the day and keep her happy, I do it. And for all you out there shaking your heads, yes I do sit for two hours at a time and hold her. Travis says it's perfectly okay to do this, as long as I am willing to deal with the consequences. Ha. If I put her in her swing or in her crib she is awake in thirty minutes and so, so very crabby. This morning I told myself that I wasn't going to do it. I wasn't going to hold her. So I dinked her and put her in the crib. Literally, I think it was 28 minutes later she was awake and crying. I did not jump up. I did not run to her side. I sat and listened and let her cry a little. After about ten minutes I went in, patted her back, calmed her down and left. Seconds later the crying started again. I can handle the crying for a little while, but I am not a "let her cry it out" momma. Eventually she was wide awake and the nap was clearly over. For the next two hours she was so unhappy. Fussy, whiney, nothing was working. This afternoon during her nap I held her. I couldn't bear another 28 minute nap. When she awoke she was smiling, happy and in the best mood. Oh, and so was I, because I napped a little too.

I honestly don't know what to do. I know that I can't hold her all the time. I know that she has got to learn to nap in the crib. But I don't know of any easy way to do this.

Here are a few pics of Morgan Kate in her new exersaucer and some pics of me and my baby girl. She loves the exersaucer!


Kathy Hardison said...

Love the new pics!! You are both doll babies!

Stephanie said...

I literally could have written that post...well excluding the apnea monitor stuff. I mean seriously you are not alone if that makes you feel any better. Allie sleeps well at night..wakes up once maybe twice every once in a while and sleeps pretty late into the morning. But naptime is a completely different issue. When I put her down she sleeps for 40 mins max(I can count the number of times on one hand that she's slept more than that since she was born) and then wakes up crying. If I pick her up and hold her she'll sleep another hour or two in my arms but if I don't then she's fussy as can be for the rest of the afternoon. there are days that i do just hold her so that she'll sleep and be happy when she wakes up and since Caleb is taking his nap instead of getting stuff done I just sit with her to satisfy her but it can get difficult so I completely understand where you're coming from. I am not a "cry it out mama" either...I can't do it no matter what anyone else says. So if you figure something out that works then please PLEASE let me know :) By the way...what does "dinks" mean? oh and I LOVE the second picture of you and MK...adorable!!! and the new's precious.

Melissa and Sam said...

You've surely eased my mind with my questions about Caroline's napping/sleeping concerns and I'm so sorry that I don't have any advice to share- I too hold Caroline for day naps because she won't sleep well if I don't- we haven't reached the crabby moments yet but the crying she's mastered if she's not rested! I love the new pics expecially of MK in her exersaucer!

The Q family said...

My advice is, if you are both happy with the arrangement and it is working, keep doing it!!!! It does not doom her to be a spoiled rotten brat, just the opposite in fact. If either of you wanted to stop for reasons other than that it is not the norm, that is a different story. However, if you enjoy it and she gets good sleep and wakes up happy, why does it need to stop? If she couldn't sleep ever that would be bad as well, but it sounds like she does great at night. Eventually she'll grow out of her need for the monitors and will get too big to want to snuggle to sleep with her mama. For right now, I'd just enjoy it and try to get a nap yourself!

Whitnie said...

My Morgan used to be the same way with napping. I would have to hold her in order for her to get a "good" nap. She eventually grew out of it and now I just put her in her crib wide awake and let her put herself to sleep for naptime. I actually call it her "alone" time because sometimes she only sleeps a little while and then just plays by herself for a while. But she usually stays in her crib for about 2 hours. Lucky for me she takes a nap in the morning and in the afternoon! I say keep holding her for as long as you want - she'll be grown up before you know it and you won't be able to rock her and hold her anymore.

Jason and Talyse Burkett said...

LOVE the new background! I wish I could hold mine when they sleep! With two of them, I can't get them used to it, though, so I have to let them cry it out sometimes. It also helps that they take pacis. I don't know what I'd do without those! Enjoy it! As Darius Rucker's song says..."It won't be like this for long."

sherry pyle said...

Her smile is so beautiful!
She sure is a happy girl.
Naps and bedtimes. Most parents and grandparents struggle with it.
The "books" give advise and then some special baby naps like a dream and we are afraid we are doing something wrong.
Each little one is different and has different needs.
As a new parent we are often insecure as to what is best. Even as a Grandmother. However, I have done whatever it takes to help the child rest.also providing me a chance to rest or work if possible.
One of my own took two naps a day and could be put right to bed.
Her brother was one who after nursing was over and he got older we laid with him. it only too minutes.
The first Grandchild didn't like his crib or any place to sleep. he slept on my bed.
His sister went to bed right away but now after the bottle is gone I rock her for a few minutes.
My point is this, maybe Morgan kate needs some holding, maybe in time she will do different.
When I hold my grandchildren as they go to sleep I always think I hold them just a few minutes longer to kiss and think of how soon they grow up. Before I know it Bryson will be 35 and his sister 29.
Its hard being a parent because we all want to raise our children well.
What works for one won't work for another.Who is to judge what is best for each child.
I'm know I still have plenty to learn and I have had experience with four little ones.
Keep enjoying these precious days as you have been.
Its good that you care so much to do the right thing.
We always try to think of the consequences of what we are doing. That works for and against us!!!!!
Morgan kate is so wonderful and so amazing in how she sleeps at night.
She is doing so well.
You have done a great job! Just look at that smile. Wow!!!!!
Maybe someone has a magic answer, I just haven't ever found it!!!

Betsy Crawford said...

My "babies" are now ages 15 and 11 and I would give just about anything to have a two-hour time period where I could hold them while they nap. Enjoy the time - it passes quickly.

caryn said...

I wouldn't worry about holding her for her naps, someday she won't want you to or she will be to big to hold her so enjoy it while you can. From reading your blog for a while there is NO way you would receive an F as a mother, look how far she has come and that is due to you!!!